As an Gynecologist and Sexual Educator, I am often asked by my patients why they don’t enjoy sex or find it difficult or impossible to reach orgasm. After a physical examination and lab work, we discuss the problems they have with their partners or husbands. These types of problems are very common, affecting over 40% of women under the age of 40 and greater than 60% of women over the age of 40. Unfortunately ladies, the problem is not with you, it is with them. My best advice in order to fix an unsatisfactory love life is first to stop trying to change yourself for him and instead ask him to change for you. You will usually find that a man willing to listen to what you want in bed is usually the one you want to keep, and the man that thinks he is “God’s Gift” is the one you should “rewrap” and give to Goodwill. SINCERELY, DR. NOVOA
Monthly Archives: March 2013
The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) recently published a committee opinion discussing the subject of Sexual and Reproductive Coercion (SRC).
SRC is a pattern of physical violence or psychologically coercive behaviors intended to control a woman’s sexual decision making, contraceptive use, or pregnancy.
These behaviors are examples of intentional attempts of others, most commonly the male sexual partner, to control the sexual and reproductive rights of a woman.
The coercion includes contraceptive sabotage, where a patient’s partner intentionally hides birth control pills, refuses to wear a condom during intercourse, makes holes in condoms, or forcefully removing intrauterine devices or vaginal contraceptive rings in an attempt to get their partner pregnant against their will.
The coercion, however, may also include pressure from family and friends by embarassing or pressuring a woman through guilt or intimidation into having a child before the woman is ready. It also includes forcing a woman to have an abortion or termination of pregnancy.
Sexual and reproductive coercion is commonly associated with sexual and physical violence. One study involving adolescent mothers on public assistance reported birth control sabotage by over 50% of their dating partner.
Recommendations in order to assist patients at risk for sexual or reproductive coercion include (1) offering hotline numbers and referrals to local domestic violence shelters and agencies, (2) offering long-acting methods of contraception less detectable to their partners such as the IUD, the Implanon or Depo Provera Injectable. (3) When using an IUD, trimming the string inside the cervix in order to prevent the partner from feeling the string or being able to pull the IUD out, (4) Provide Emergency Contraceptive (Plan B) pills and (5) Provide harm-reduction strategies and safety planning.